Thursday, December 22, 2011

A Year in Review (In Which I Didn't Lose Weight and I'm Happy About It)

I didn't lose a single pound between Jan 1st 2011 and today. And I'm completely happy about that. Why you may ask? Because that means I've maintained a 60 pound weight loss for an entire year. It's gone! Never to be seen again! I got as low as 67 pounds lost, but the past few months I've been hovering between 150-155. And I'm OK with that. It means I've adapted my lifestyle. This whole journey is about the lifestyle change, and I think I've started to be able to do it. I still eat out with my boyfriend or friends, I still have the occassional treat. But I also go to the gym every night that I can manange to balance it out, and I'm still tracking my food a majority of the days. I started this year right around 151, and I'm ending it around 155 (this week has been busy, haha). Success!!!

I know I tend to focus on a number all the time, and I still want to get my "hovering" number down to 150 instead of 155. But that's only so my pants fit a little better, haha. I'm in amazing shape (altho my running skills have lapsed a bit), and I feel healthy. That's what's important. It took me an entire year to realize not to beat myself up over every single thing I eat, the days I miss a workout, or letting the scale jump a pound or two. It's about balancing everything, and I'm working towards that. Doesn't mean I won't pick up the pace a bit this winter so I look even better for the spring, but I'm in a good place to start 2012 right :)

And here's the reason for this post, a yearly review survey that I've filled out every year for the past 8 years. It's an interesting reflection on how it's gone and what I've accomplished.

1. What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?

Maintained my 60 pound weight loss successfully, ran a 5K (no, 3 5Ks!!!), traveled on a few business trips to California, ate octopus balls, grasshoppers and venison (I'm a picky eater otherwise), and bought a condo!!!!!.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions?
Last year I said "I'm committing myself to hitting my goal weight and keeping it there in 2011." I've adjusted my goal weight slightly (at least for now), but I've certainly kept my promise to keep it there all year. This coming year, I want to keep that up, and maybe even inch that number down more.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
A few friends had babies.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

5. What countries did you visit?
I didn't leave the country this year... bummer. I'll have to change that for next year!

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Last year I wished for a flat stomach... hahaha. That would be nice this coming year too... And I'll have my condo for 2012, which is going to be amazing.

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Lots of fun weekends with Randy, friends and family. An awesome business trip in September to California where I got to sightsee a bit (yay Stone Brewery, where apparently everyone knew my name by time I left). My closing date on my condo is Dec 30th. And on the luckiest day of the year, 11/11/11, I put in an offer for my condo that was accepted :)

8. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year?
Getting the guts (and cash) to buy a condo, and maintaining my weight loss.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I don't think I've really failed at anything, I prefer to think of them as bumps in the road on the way to success. haha

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Just allergies... and a nasty cold around Thansgiving.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My boyfriend, my friends and my family rock as usual.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My neighbors that live next to me, above me, etc in my apartment suck. A lot. Thank god I'm moving.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Buying a condo isn't cheap. I'm gonna be writing a very big check next week... And neither is replacing my entire wardrobe with clothes that actually fit. But I don't mind paying for either, totally worth it.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Holidays/birthdays with Randy, condo hunting, condo buying... not so much the condo packing part that will come in a few weeks, haha.

16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
I had a thing for Adele songs this year (as did everyone else).

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Definitely happier
b) thinner or fatter? Just the same, and I like it :)
c) richer or poorer? Poorer, since I'm about to give all my money to my mortgage company

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I wouldn't have minded traveling even more... hehe

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Stressing out over little things like eating one snack or missing one workout. I just have to roll with it and stop freaking out.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I was at my aunt's house with one side of the family, and then Granny's house with all my younger cousins on the other side. Nothing exciting, it's what we do every year.

21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
I have my boyfriend, I'm a happy camper :)

22. How many one-night stands?
None, otherwise I'd be in trouble, haha

23. What was your favorite TV program?
I discovered Modern Family this year, such a good show.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Just my trashy neighbors, especially the loud dirty ones that got evicted, hahaha.

25. What was the best book you read?
Ummm... did I read a book this year....? That's sad. I need to do more of that this coming year.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Adele, she rocks.

27. What did you want and get?
A place to live that's all my own :)

28. What did you want and not get?
I wanted to get down to 140, and I'm still 10-15 pounds away. But I'm adapting as I go, so I'm not too bummed.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
The last Harry Potter movie, I loved it. So sad...

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 25, a quarter of a century. Randy and I went to dinner at Churchkey in DC (an awesome restaurant and beer bar) and we spent the evening there. And we got an amazing parking space around the corner. It's sad we reminisce about such things... haha. It was a blast :)

31.What was one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I can't think of anything... I'm happy

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
I replaced all my clothes pretty much, same style. A little preppy, business casual most of the time, but now I have cute mini skirts, nice tops, and hot shoes... hahaha

33. What kept you sane?
Beer... honestly. Beer + Randy is a good sane-maintaining combo

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Ummmm... dunno. Anyone but the Kardashians.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Just one? This whole Payroll Tax thing is pissing me off. And basically everything else Congress *hasn't* done this year. It's BS....

36. Who did you miss?
I miss my friends and family scattered around the country, but at least I always have an awesome selection of places to visit to see people :)

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Any of the cool friends I may have added to my list in the last year.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
Sometimes your goals have to change to adapt to reality. Sure, hitting 140 was my ultimate goal, but I saw that my body wasn't cooperating like I wanted it to. So I'm adjusting and keeping my goals realistic. And don't be afraid to take a big leap, I never thought I'd buy a condo until a month ago when I actually sat down to look at the possibility. And now I have one :)

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Hmm... that's a tough one. Nothing is jumping into my mind. I'll go with my staple.

"Don't stop believing" - Journey

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Relighting The Fire

I just spent the last few minutes looking back at my weight loss record since I started. It was pretty awesome for the first 8 months, when I lost 45 pounds pretty quickly and didn't really plateau at all (minus a week or two). Then I slowly got my way down to 150 from 155 over another 2 months. And then for the entirety of 2011, it's been up and down within 5 pounds of 150. Plateau, maintenance, my body being content, I don't know but that's what this year has looked like.

The past week I've really been trying to assess what was different. What changed from the first half to the second half of these last 18 months? Part of it is that the last few months I've been slacking (as I've moaned about repeatedly), but there's some other unknown variable. And I think I've figured it out.

It's that motivation and earnest and unabashed determination that I had to succeed. I was full of it in the beginning. I loved how I looked, shopped for new clothes, figured out my body is capable of more than I realized. And then it sort of fizzled out when I got comfortable with my size and fitness level. I wasn't pushing myself to discover what else I was capable of.

And now I'm starting to wonder again. I'm at 154.7 lbs as of this morning, I ended 2010 at 151. My goal is to end the year 1 pound less than I was at the start. Doesn't seem like much, but to me that 1 pound might as well be 50 (which is how much I lost in 2010). It proves to myself that I'm in it for the long haul. That the weight ISN'T coming back. And that I've transformed myself into something new. But why quit there?

I need to get some momentum going into 2012. So I'm taking December to try and find what really was lighting a fire under my ass in the beginning. I want to look hot in my New Years Eve dress, and feel completely confident in my clothes, and not get tired from running after only 5 minutes (my running endurance is a bit shot right now). I need to get more strict with food, I've been giving into indulgences WAY too often and way too much. It might be the holiday season, but I want to start 2012 on the right foot.

I'm starting small. One pound a week. That's all I want to get me down to 150 for January 1st. I don't need to go crazy, hardly eat for 3 days and then the weekend throws me off. It's all about balance and keeping my days consistent. Once I'm back at 150, I can see what I want to do from there. It's still my ultimate goal to get further into the 140s. But my body put up quite the fight last time I tried, I never saw below 147 despite all my best efforts. Maybe with taking some time off the last few months, my body is ready for a bit of a shock again to drop 5 more pounds. But I won't know until I try. It might prove that I can do it, or it might prove that 150 is a good point for me.

Whatever my ultimate goal is, the fire to find out have been relit. Hopefully this motivation gets me through the holiday season and into January with lots to look forward to next year.