I read this article recently on the NY Times, and it really shed some light over my struggles in the last year trying to maintain my 60+ pound weight loss. Namely, that my body hates me... haha.
But really, it does illustrate perfectly that people who have lost a lot of weight have a completely different battle maintaining it than someone who has been the same weight all along. One or two days of less than healthy eating and I'm up on the scale for a week. I can eat under 1500 calories a day and I'm just maintaining. Losing more requires extraordinary measures, and I'm still 10+ pounds above a healthy weight for someone my height at 5'3". Basically, my battle is never really over. I'm just hoping it settles down in time.
Lately, I've realized how easy it is to lapse and let the scale creep up a few pounds. It doesn't take much. A few meals at Christmas, a few extra beers, and a few less workouts. But I've still tried to pick healthy items, workout when I could... and the scale still jumped up. I can see this is how people get discouraged and start to give up. It's EXHAUSTING trying to do this 24/7, every single day. I can't stop thinking about it. I can't stop moving. And this is all to maintain my weight or lose a few of the extra pounds. I'm not even trying to get down to 140 right now because I'm having issues getting to 150 and staying there.
I'm writing this blog mainly to vent my frustrations, but to also show people that maintenance is almost harder than the weight loss. I was dropping 1-2 pounds a week for a good 6 months and it wasn't this difficult. Then once I got to 150 and got stuck, it stayed that way for all of 2011.
I'm determined to make 2012 different. I need to get back into my peak workout shape. I gave up the running around summertime, and I might need to start that up again. I was under 150 when I ran and it stayed there. That'll be painful to get going, I lost my stamina. I'd like to get back into 5K shape by the spring though, I did really enjoy running those races and it gave me a goal to work towards. And hopefully it will help me get back down to around 150 where I was really comfortable. Even if it's still 5-10 pounds above my initial goal, I know it's attainable and more importantly MAINTAINABLE! People forget about that second part. Sure, reaching your goal is important but you have to think about staying there for, technically, the rest of your life. If you get down to 120 and stay there for a day and go right back up again, it's better to stop somewhere that you feel comfortable maintaining. It takes a lot of effort to maintain a weight. If you have to go to extraordinary lengths to do it, it won't stick. I could never eat 1200 calories a day the rest of my life. But at 150, regular exercise and eating 1500-1800, it was very doable.
So the lesson I want everyone to take with them today, MAINTAINABLE goals are crucial, just not attainable.
My goals in the next few months are these:
- Get back into my running form (it's gonna require the gym, but I'm willing to commit, I did it last winter!)
- Work my way slowly back down to 150 without sabotaging myself
- Get my unnecessary eating under control. I really need to stop buying food I know I shouldn't be eating, especially in larger quantities. I'm better getting one small treat that's gone after I eat it.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Thursday, December 22, 2011
A Year in Review (In Which I Didn't Lose Weight and I'm Happy About It)
I didn't lose a single pound between Jan 1st 2011 and today. And I'm completely happy about that. Why you may ask? Because that means I've maintained a 60 pound weight loss for an entire year. It's gone! Never to be seen again! I got as low as 67 pounds lost, but the past few months I've been hovering between 150-155. And I'm OK with that. It means I've adapted my lifestyle. This whole journey is about the lifestyle change, and I think I've started to be able to do it. I still eat out with my boyfriend or friends, I still have the occassional treat. But I also go to the gym every night that I can manange to balance it out, and I'm still tracking my food a majority of the days. I started this year right around 151, and I'm ending it around 155 (this week has been busy, haha). Success!!!
I know I tend to focus on a number all the time, and I still want to get my "hovering" number down to 150 instead of 155. But that's only so my pants fit a little better, haha. I'm in amazing shape (altho my running skills have lapsed a bit), and I feel healthy. That's what's important. It took me an entire year to realize not to beat myself up over every single thing I eat, the days I miss a workout, or letting the scale jump a pound or two. It's about balancing everything, and I'm working towards that. Doesn't mean I won't pick up the pace a bit this winter so I look even better for the spring, but I'm in a good place to start 2012 right :)
And here's the reason for this post, a yearly review survey that I've filled out every year for the past 8 years. It's an interesting reflection on how it's gone and what I've accomplished.
1. What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?
Maintained my 60 pound weight loss successfully, ran a 5K (no, 3 5Ks!!!), traveled on a few business trips to California, ate octopus balls, grasshoppers and venison (I'm a picky eater otherwise), and bought a condo!!!!!.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions?
Last year I said "I'm committing myself to hitting my goal weight and keeping it there in 2011." I've adjusted my goal weight slightly (at least for now), but I've certainly kept my promise to keep it there all year. This coming year, I want to keep that up, and maybe even inch that number down more.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
A few friends had babies.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
No
5. What countries did you visit?
I didn't leave the country this year... bummer. I'll have to change that for next year!
6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Last year I wished for a flat stomach... hahaha. That would be nice this coming year too... And I'll have my condo for 2012, which is going to be amazing.
7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Lots of fun weekends with Randy, friends and family. An awesome business trip in September to California where I got to sightsee a bit (yay Stone Brewery, where apparently everyone knew my name by time I left). My closing date on my condo is Dec 30th. And on the luckiest day of the year, 11/11/11, I put in an offer for my condo that was accepted :)
8. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year?
Getting the guts (and cash) to buy a condo, and maintaining my weight loss.
9. What was your biggest failure?
I don't think I've really failed at anything, I prefer to think of them as bumps in the road on the way to success. haha
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Just allergies... and a nasty cold around Thansgiving.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
A CONDO!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My boyfriend, my friends and my family rock as usual.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My neighbors that live next to me, above me, etc in my apartment suck. A lot. Thank god I'm moving.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Buying a condo isn't cheap. I'm gonna be writing a very big check next week... And neither is replacing my entire wardrobe with clothes that actually fit. But I don't mind paying for either, totally worth it.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Holidays/birthdays with Randy, condo hunting, condo buying... not so much the condo packing part that will come in a few weeks, haha.
16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
I had a thing for Adele songs this year (as did everyone else).
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Definitely happier
b) thinner or fatter? Just the same, and I like it :)
c) richer or poorer? Poorer, since I'm about to give all my money to my mortgage company
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I wouldn't have minded traveling even more... hehe
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Stressing out over little things like eating one snack or missing one workout. I just have to roll with it and stop freaking out.
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I was at my aunt's house with one side of the family, and then Granny's house with all my younger cousins on the other side. Nothing exciting, it's what we do every year.
21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
I have my boyfriend, I'm a happy camper :)
22. How many one-night stands?
None, otherwise I'd be in trouble, haha
23. What was your favorite TV program?
I discovered Modern Family this year, such a good show.
24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Just my trashy neighbors, especially the loud dirty ones that got evicted, hahaha.
25. What was the best book you read?
Ummm... did I read a book this year....? That's sad. I need to do more of that this coming year.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Adele, she rocks.
27. What did you want and get?
A place to live that's all my own :)
28. What did you want and not get?
I wanted to get down to 140, and I'm still 10-15 pounds away. But I'm adapting as I go, so I'm not too bummed.
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
The last Harry Potter movie, I loved it. So sad...
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 25, a quarter of a century. Randy and I went to dinner at Churchkey in DC (an awesome restaurant and beer bar) and we spent the evening there. And we got an amazing parking space around the corner. It's sad we reminisce about such things... haha. It was a blast :)
31.What was one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I can't think of anything... I'm happy
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
I replaced all my clothes pretty much, same style. A little preppy, business casual most of the time, but now I have cute mini skirts, nice tops, and hot shoes... hahaha
33. What kept you sane?
Beer... honestly. Beer + Randy is a good sane-maintaining combo
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Ummmm... dunno. Anyone but the Kardashians.
35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Just one? This whole Payroll Tax thing is pissing me off. And basically everything else Congress *hasn't* done this year. It's BS....
36. Who did you miss?
I miss my friends and family scattered around the country, but at least I always have an awesome selection of places to visit to see people :)
37. Who was the best new person you met?
Any of the cool friends I may have added to my list in the last year.
38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
Sometimes your goals have to change to adapt to reality. Sure, hitting 140 was my ultimate goal, but I saw that my body wasn't cooperating like I wanted it to. So I'm adjusting and keeping my goals realistic. And don't be afraid to take a big leap, I never thought I'd buy a condo until a month ago when I actually sat down to look at the possibility. And now I have one :)
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Hmm... that's a tough one. Nothing is jumping into my mind. I'll go with my staple.
"Don't stop believing" - Journey
I know I tend to focus on a number all the time, and I still want to get my "hovering" number down to 150 instead of 155. But that's only so my pants fit a little better, haha. I'm in amazing shape (altho my running skills have lapsed a bit), and I feel healthy. That's what's important. It took me an entire year to realize not to beat myself up over every single thing I eat, the days I miss a workout, or letting the scale jump a pound or two. It's about balancing everything, and I'm working towards that. Doesn't mean I won't pick up the pace a bit this winter so I look even better for the spring, but I'm in a good place to start 2012 right :)
And here's the reason for this post, a yearly review survey that I've filled out every year for the past 8 years. It's an interesting reflection on how it's gone and what I've accomplished.
1. What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?
Maintained my 60 pound weight loss successfully, ran a 5K (no, 3 5Ks!!!), traveled on a few business trips to California, ate octopus balls, grasshoppers and venison (I'm a picky eater otherwise), and bought a condo!!!!!.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions?
Last year I said "I'm committing myself to hitting my goal weight and keeping it there in 2011." I've adjusted my goal weight slightly (at least for now), but I've certainly kept my promise to keep it there all year. This coming year, I want to keep that up, and maybe even inch that number down more.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
A few friends had babies.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
No
5. What countries did you visit?
I didn't leave the country this year... bummer. I'll have to change that for next year!
6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Last year I wished for a flat stomach... hahaha. That would be nice this coming year too... And I'll have my condo for 2012, which is going to be amazing.
7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Lots of fun weekends with Randy, friends and family. An awesome business trip in September to California where I got to sightsee a bit (yay Stone Brewery, where apparently everyone knew my name by time I left). My closing date on my condo is Dec 30th. And on the luckiest day of the year, 11/11/11, I put in an offer for my condo that was accepted :)
8. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year?
Getting the guts (and cash) to buy a condo, and maintaining my weight loss.
9. What was your biggest failure?
I don't think I've really failed at anything, I prefer to think of them as bumps in the road on the way to success. haha
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Just allergies... and a nasty cold around Thansgiving.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
A CONDO!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My boyfriend, my friends and my family rock as usual.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My neighbors that live next to me, above me, etc in my apartment suck. A lot. Thank god I'm moving.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Buying a condo isn't cheap. I'm gonna be writing a very big check next week... And neither is replacing my entire wardrobe with clothes that actually fit. But I don't mind paying for either, totally worth it.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Holidays/birthdays with Randy, condo hunting, condo buying... not so much the condo packing part that will come in a few weeks, haha.
16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
I had a thing for Adele songs this year (as did everyone else).
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Definitely happier
b) thinner or fatter? Just the same, and I like it :)
c) richer or poorer? Poorer, since I'm about to give all my money to my mortgage company
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I wouldn't have minded traveling even more... hehe
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Stressing out over little things like eating one snack or missing one workout. I just have to roll with it and stop freaking out.
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I was at my aunt's house with one side of the family, and then Granny's house with all my younger cousins on the other side. Nothing exciting, it's what we do every year.
21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
I have my boyfriend, I'm a happy camper :)
22. How many one-night stands?
None, otherwise I'd be in trouble, haha
23. What was your favorite TV program?
I discovered Modern Family this year, such a good show.
24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Just my trashy neighbors, especially the loud dirty ones that got evicted, hahaha.
25. What was the best book you read?
Ummm... did I read a book this year....? That's sad. I need to do more of that this coming year.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Adele, she rocks.
27. What did you want and get?
A place to live that's all my own :)
28. What did you want and not get?
I wanted to get down to 140, and I'm still 10-15 pounds away. But I'm adapting as I go, so I'm not too bummed.
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
The last Harry Potter movie, I loved it. So sad...
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 25, a quarter of a century. Randy and I went to dinner at Churchkey in DC (an awesome restaurant and beer bar) and we spent the evening there. And we got an amazing parking space around the corner. It's sad we reminisce about such things... haha. It was a blast :)
31.What was one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I can't think of anything... I'm happy
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
I replaced all my clothes pretty much, same style. A little preppy, business casual most of the time, but now I have cute mini skirts, nice tops, and hot shoes... hahaha
33. What kept you sane?
Beer... honestly. Beer + Randy is a good sane-maintaining combo
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Ummmm... dunno. Anyone but the Kardashians.
35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Just one? This whole Payroll Tax thing is pissing me off. And basically everything else Congress *hasn't* done this year. It's BS....
36. Who did you miss?
I miss my friends and family scattered around the country, but at least I always have an awesome selection of places to visit to see people :)
37. Who was the best new person you met?
Any of the cool friends I may have added to my list in the last year.
38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
Sometimes your goals have to change to adapt to reality. Sure, hitting 140 was my ultimate goal, but I saw that my body wasn't cooperating like I wanted it to. So I'm adjusting and keeping my goals realistic. And don't be afraid to take a big leap, I never thought I'd buy a condo until a month ago when I actually sat down to look at the possibility. And now I have one :)
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Hmm... that's a tough one. Nothing is jumping into my mind. I'll go with my staple.
"Don't stop believing" - Journey
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Relighting The Fire
I just spent the last few minutes looking back at my weight loss record since I started. It was pretty awesome for the first 8 months, when I lost 45 pounds pretty quickly and didn't really plateau at all (minus a week or two). Then I slowly got my way down to 150 from 155 over another 2 months. And then for the entirety of 2011, it's been up and down within 5 pounds of 150. Plateau, maintenance, my body being content, I don't know but that's what this year has looked like.
The past week I've really been trying to assess what was different. What changed from the first half to the second half of these last 18 months? Part of it is that the last few months I've been slacking (as I've moaned about repeatedly), but there's some other unknown variable. And I think I've figured it out.
It's that motivation and earnest and unabashed determination that I had to succeed. I was full of it in the beginning. I loved how I looked, shopped for new clothes, figured out my body is capable of more than I realized. And then it sort of fizzled out when I got comfortable with my size and fitness level. I wasn't pushing myself to discover what else I was capable of.
And now I'm starting to wonder again. I'm at 154.7 lbs as of this morning, I ended 2010 at 151. My goal is to end the year 1 pound less than I was at the start. Doesn't seem like much, but to me that 1 pound might as well be 50 (which is how much I lost in 2010). It proves to myself that I'm in it for the long haul. That the weight ISN'T coming back. And that I've transformed myself into something new. But why quit there?
I need to get some momentum going into 2012. So I'm taking December to try and find what really was lighting a fire under my ass in the beginning. I want to look hot in my New Years Eve dress, and feel completely confident in my clothes, and not get tired from running after only 5 minutes (my running endurance is a bit shot right now). I need to get more strict with food, I've been giving into indulgences WAY too often and way too much. It might be the holiday season, but I want to start 2012 on the right foot.
I'm starting small. One pound a week. That's all I want to get me down to 150 for January 1st. I don't need to go crazy, hardly eat for 3 days and then the weekend throws me off. It's all about balance and keeping my days consistent. Once I'm back at 150, I can see what I want to do from there. It's still my ultimate goal to get further into the 140s. But my body put up quite the fight last time I tried, I never saw below 147 despite all my best efforts. Maybe with taking some time off the last few months, my body is ready for a bit of a shock again to drop 5 more pounds. But I won't know until I try. It might prove that I can do it, or it might prove that 150 is a good point for me.
Whatever my ultimate goal is, the fire to find out have been relit. Hopefully this motivation gets me through the holiday season and into January with lots to look forward to next year.
The past week I've really been trying to assess what was different. What changed from the first half to the second half of these last 18 months? Part of it is that the last few months I've been slacking (as I've moaned about repeatedly), but there's some other unknown variable. And I think I've figured it out.
It's that motivation and earnest and unabashed determination that I had to succeed. I was full of it in the beginning. I loved how I looked, shopped for new clothes, figured out my body is capable of more than I realized. And then it sort of fizzled out when I got comfortable with my size and fitness level. I wasn't pushing myself to discover what else I was capable of.
And now I'm starting to wonder again. I'm at 154.7 lbs as of this morning, I ended 2010 at 151. My goal is to end the year 1 pound less than I was at the start. Doesn't seem like much, but to me that 1 pound might as well be 50 (which is how much I lost in 2010). It proves to myself that I'm in it for the long haul. That the weight ISN'T coming back. And that I've transformed myself into something new. But why quit there?
I need to get some momentum going into 2012. So I'm taking December to try and find what really was lighting a fire under my ass in the beginning. I want to look hot in my New Years Eve dress, and feel completely confident in my clothes, and not get tired from running after only 5 minutes (my running endurance is a bit shot right now). I need to get more strict with food, I've been giving into indulgences WAY too often and way too much. It might be the holiday season, but I want to start 2012 on the right foot.
I'm starting small. One pound a week. That's all I want to get me down to 150 for January 1st. I don't need to go crazy, hardly eat for 3 days and then the weekend throws me off. It's all about balance and keeping my days consistent. Once I'm back at 150, I can see what I want to do from there. It's still my ultimate goal to get further into the 140s. But my body put up quite the fight last time I tried, I never saw below 147 despite all my best efforts. Maybe with taking some time off the last few months, my body is ready for a bit of a shock again to drop 5 more pounds. But I won't know until I try. It might prove that I can do it, or it might prove that 150 is a good point for me.
Whatever my ultimate goal is, the fire to find out have been relit. Hopefully this motivation gets me through the holiday season and into January with lots to look forward to next year.
Friday, November 18, 2011
Resetting the Ticker
After well over a month of seeing the larger number, I had to do something to motivate me to get it back down again. So when I logged into MFP this morning, I did this...
Last recorded weight: 155.7 lbs on 11/18/11
Yep, its not fun to admit, but I can't keep pretending that "oh, it's just extra sodium and it'll be back to normal by Friday". Well, it's Friday, and that's the new normal... and I don't like it. I'm only 5'2", 5 lbs makes a difference. My work pants were a tad snug, my shirts weren't laying flat, and it was frustration because it seemed like I'd get on track for a day or two, and then something would come up and all self restraint goes out the window. Especially with working out, some days I just don't feel like it. And part of it is I think the need to change it up.
Anyway, it just goes to show that it can happen to anyone. Even though I've lost (now) 59 lbs total, it is going to be a life-long battle to keep it off. I'm happy that I've caught myself after only a few pounds. I've noticed that I haven't been my usual, healthy self lately and it's disappointing. But I really don't see my life getting any less busy, I've said this a million times: I can't be a diet hermit. So I'm just going to have to start working in healthier choices into my busy schedule. It helps that Randy and I have said we need to eat out less because it's expensive, it's also unhealthy! I'm well on my way to buying a condo, and I need to save money. But it also allows me to finally buy an elliptical! It will be nice having a machine right in my second bedroom to hop on at any time. I've gotten a bit bored with Turbo Fire, I've done the workouts for a year now.
I also haven't been setting goals for myself lately. I think without a defined goal, I let myself slide too much. So... here they are:
- Get back down to 150 by Christmas
- Don't let my weight swing up 5 lbs and back down a few in the span of a couple days, it just goes to show that I went overboard that day
- Get back into working out regularly - and with intensity! No slacking, even if it's just a 30 minute workout, I need to go 100%
- Make much smarter food choices. I'm fine when I stick to my usual routine for breakfast, lunch and dinner. But throw in a beer, a meal out, Donut Thursdays, and my weakness in Trader Joes (I have to give away those cookies...), and you have too much temptation.
- LOG EVERYTHING! Even if it's terrible... it's better to see the damage and know that I need to do better
So, hopefully these get me through the month of December, with all the holiday goodies, parties, Christmas cookies and busier than usual schedules. Randy's birthday is sandwiched in there too. But seeing that ticker every day will hopefully push me in the direction that I need. I can't afford to let this trend continue! Literally, I don't have the extra money for new pants :P
Last recorded weight: 155.7 lbs on 11/18/11
Yep, its not fun to admit, but I can't keep pretending that "oh, it's just extra sodium and it'll be back to normal by Friday". Well, it's Friday, and that's the new normal... and I don't like it. I'm only 5'2", 5 lbs makes a difference. My work pants were a tad snug, my shirts weren't laying flat, and it was frustration because it seemed like I'd get on track for a day or two, and then something would come up and all self restraint goes out the window. Especially with working out, some days I just don't feel like it. And part of it is I think the need to change it up.
Anyway, it just goes to show that it can happen to anyone. Even though I've lost (now) 59 lbs total, it is going to be a life-long battle to keep it off. I'm happy that I've caught myself after only a few pounds. I've noticed that I haven't been my usual, healthy self lately and it's disappointing. But I really don't see my life getting any less busy, I've said this a million times: I can't be a diet hermit. So I'm just going to have to start working in healthier choices into my busy schedule. It helps that Randy and I have said we need to eat out less because it's expensive, it's also unhealthy! I'm well on my way to buying a condo, and I need to save money. But it also allows me to finally buy an elliptical! It will be nice having a machine right in my second bedroom to hop on at any time. I've gotten a bit bored with Turbo Fire, I've done the workouts for a year now.
I also haven't been setting goals for myself lately. I think without a defined goal, I let myself slide too much. So... here they are:
- Get back down to 150 by Christmas
- Don't let my weight swing up 5 lbs and back down a few in the span of a couple days, it just goes to show that I went overboard that day
- Get back into working out regularly - and with intensity! No slacking, even if it's just a 30 minute workout, I need to go 100%
- Make much smarter food choices. I'm fine when I stick to my usual routine for breakfast, lunch and dinner. But throw in a beer, a meal out, Donut Thursdays, and my weakness in Trader Joes (I have to give away those cookies...), and you have too much temptation.
- LOG EVERYTHING! Even if it's terrible... it's better to see the damage and know that I need to do better
So, hopefully these get me through the month of December, with all the holiday goodies, parties, Christmas cookies and busier than usual schedules. Randy's birthday is sandwiched in there too. But seeing that ticker every day will hopefully push me in the direction that I need. I can't afford to let this trend continue! Literally, I don't have the extra money for new pants :P
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Ran Over By The Wagon
Lately, I've been hanging on to "the wagon". But in the last few weeks, I flat out fell off of it and got ran over by it. Repeatedly.
I will be the first to admit that I've been a bit too generous with myself. October was such a busy month with trips, birthdays, and food opportunities. My weight has been yo-yoing from as low as 152 to as high as 160. That can't be healthy! All in the span of a few weeks. I let special events, like my birthday, turn into an entire weekend of eating whatever I want. That's happened two weekends in a row and it's showing on the scale... and on my sillouette!
Going into the holiday season now, I can't afford to slip any more. I weigh more right now than I did this time last year (only by a few pounds, but still...). My maintenance is slowly slipping and I really don't want to start an upward trend. I don't feel as good as I used to, not as motivated. I thought it was just getting used to maintaining, but it seems I've just gotten back into some old habits with food and ordering whatever I want.
So I need a plan. Fast. I'm not about to let a year and a half of hard work start to slip. Surprisingly, my November doesn't look as chaotic as I would have expected. Randy is out of town this weekend so I'm on my own (aka no restaurant food). The following weekend we're going to Williamsburg, and the weekend before Thanksgiving I don't have anything. That leaves me a fairly steady schedule to stick to of working out and not eating too much.
And I didn't realize it, but I kind of miss running. When I ran, my weight wasn't nearly as all over the place. I was sticking right around 150 (usually lower) but once I stopped running regularly, it's been creeping back up. Now that I have my Touchpad to watching movies on the treadmill, it's really helping to get me to the gym and run. I've been doing intervals, my endurance is shot and I need to build it up again, so speed intervals are my weapon of choice. And I think I need a new inhaler, mine isn't spraying very well since it's kept in my giant purse and probably is somewhat broken. Anyways, no more excuses. "The treadmills are always full at the gym." So... wait for one! "I don't have the energy." Well, muster some up! There are a million reasons not to... and a million reasons why I need to.
And as for food... I think I need to avoid Italian restaurants for a while. I ate entirely too much buttery pasta this weekend. And bread. I need to go back to actually thinking about the nutritional content of the food I'm choosing! Not what looks delicious. I haven't been drinking that much, so that helps.
I know a lot of people who read my blog look to me to be an example of how to successfully lose weight... and keep it off! And I'm still 60 pounds lighter than when I started. But... that number has shrunk a bit. I really need to be accountable, log on MFP what my weight is, and work to get that number down. And with all of you watching and keeping track of me, I can stick to it. Time to step up my game!
I've said this a few times in the last two months, but I really need to make the committment to stick to it. I've gotten used to being thinner. I like looking in the mirror and not hating what I see. But I also know that I can do better. I need to see those 140s again, I'm not about to give up and I still would love to reach my ultimate goal of 140. I just need to focus and go back to what was working for me. Healthy food, lots of INTENSE exercise, and some extra motivation.
Despite that, I had my birthday 2 weeks ago, and I felt more amazing than I have in my life. The photo below says it all... I've NEVER EVER thought I could wear a dress like this. It's just motivation to make it look even more amazing when I likely wear it again on New Years Eve.
I will be the first to admit that I've been a bit too generous with myself. October was such a busy month with trips, birthdays, and food opportunities. My weight has been yo-yoing from as low as 152 to as high as 160. That can't be healthy! All in the span of a few weeks. I let special events, like my birthday, turn into an entire weekend of eating whatever I want. That's happened two weekends in a row and it's showing on the scale... and on my sillouette!
Going into the holiday season now, I can't afford to slip any more. I weigh more right now than I did this time last year (only by a few pounds, but still...). My maintenance is slowly slipping and I really don't want to start an upward trend. I don't feel as good as I used to, not as motivated. I thought it was just getting used to maintaining, but it seems I've just gotten back into some old habits with food and ordering whatever I want.
So I need a plan. Fast. I'm not about to let a year and a half of hard work start to slip. Surprisingly, my November doesn't look as chaotic as I would have expected. Randy is out of town this weekend so I'm on my own (aka no restaurant food). The following weekend we're going to Williamsburg, and the weekend before Thanksgiving I don't have anything. That leaves me a fairly steady schedule to stick to of working out and not eating too much.
And I didn't realize it, but I kind of miss running. When I ran, my weight wasn't nearly as all over the place. I was sticking right around 150 (usually lower) but once I stopped running regularly, it's been creeping back up. Now that I have my Touchpad to watching movies on the treadmill, it's really helping to get me to the gym and run. I've been doing intervals, my endurance is shot and I need to build it up again, so speed intervals are my weapon of choice. And I think I need a new inhaler, mine isn't spraying very well since it's kept in my giant purse and probably is somewhat broken. Anyways, no more excuses. "The treadmills are always full at the gym." So... wait for one! "I don't have the energy." Well, muster some up! There are a million reasons not to... and a million reasons why I need to.
And as for food... I think I need to avoid Italian restaurants for a while. I ate entirely too much buttery pasta this weekend. And bread. I need to go back to actually thinking about the nutritional content of the food I'm choosing! Not what looks delicious. I haven't been drinking that much, so that helps.
I know a lot of people who read my blog look to me to be an example of how to successfully lose weight... and keep it off! And I'm still 60 pounds lighter than when I started. But... that number has shrunk a bit. I really need to be accountable, log on MFP what my weight is, and work to get that number down. And with all of you watching and keeping track of me, I can stick to it. Time to step up my game!
I've said this a few times in the last two months, but I really need to make the committment to stick to it. I've gotten used to being thinner. I like looking in the mirror and not hating what I see. But I also know that I can do better. I need to see those 140s again, I'm not about to give up and I still would love to reach my ultimate goal of 140. I just need to focus and go back to what was working for me. Healthy food, lots of INTENSE exercise, and some extra motivation.
Despite that, I had my birthday 2 weeks ago, and I felt more amazing than I have in my life. The photo below says it all... I've NEVER EVER thought I could wear a dress like this. It's just motivation to make it look even more amazing when I likely wear it again on New Years Eve.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
I'm Back in the Game!
I admit, I scared myself there. I've been so focused since February 2010 on getting healthy, losing weight, and just in general being happy. And slowly I got comfortable with my weight (148-150 with the intent to eventually get down to 140), with my eating (a treat isn't a bad thing), and my schedule (well, if I don't work out every day it won't kill me). And then comfort turned into complacent. And then just lazy. No more!
9 day ago, I came back from a business trip immediately followed by a weekend in Jersey, stepped on my scale and saw 160.0. I was angry and frustrated, but there was a new feeling I haven't had in a few months. Pure motivation! I've seen that number before, a year ago, and it was on a downward trend to 150. I hadn't seen my weight go up more than 2-3 pounds in many months. And it made me realize that I need to finish what I started!
And of course, I picked the worst possible time to get "back in gear", but is there ever a perfect time? Life happens. I have my birthday and 1st anniversary with my boyfriend this Saturday. I have a friend's wedding next Saturday. A weekend trip in November. But that isn't going to stop me from keeping my focus. I've been bad about fitting in working when I get busy. And letting myself completely go in restaurants. Really with no excuse other than I got lazy. And I know as well as anyone that losing weight and being healthy takes effort. So here's what I'm gonna do:
1. Work out at least 5 times a week. Even if it's for 30 minutes, it's still keeping my metabolism going. I've been able to work out all but one day since last Tuesday and it's helped so much. And a few extra hundred calories to absorb any birthday treats always helps!
2. Be smart when ordering food that I didn't make. Restaurants have been especially bad, and I know I'll be drinking beer on my birthday. No need to compound the beer calories with crap food calories. There are delicious, healthy things i can choose instead.
3. Don't go over my 1500 calories, preferably stay around 1300. That's the biggest change I've made in the past week, dropped my calories down from an entirely too generous number. I'm eating lots of protein, fruits and such, I just need to minimize the extra snacking. Therefore, no more Triscuits, hahaha.
Hopefully with keeping these things in mind, I'll have a great birthday weekend and I won't be playing catchup for 2 weeks after it. I have my friend's wedding next weekend too, so fitting in workouts will be a bit trickier. Hopefully working out Mon-Fri with Sat and Sun off will be OK. I feel so much better and my clothes look better that I'm not giving up now. Maybe this will give me the push I need to finally get further into the 140s! It started with just getting back down to 150, but if I'm losing and it continues, that would be AMAZING. We'll see how it goes, a week at a time.
9 day ago, I came back from a business trip immediately followed by a weekend in Jersey, stepped on my scale and saw 160.0. I was angry and frustrated, but there was a new feeling I haven't had in a few months. Pure motivation! I've seen that number before, a year ago, and it was on a downward trend to 150. I hadn't seen my weight go up more than 2-3 pounds in many months. And it made me realize that I need to finish what I started!
And of course, I picked the worst possible time to get "back in gear", but is there ever a perfect time? Life happens. I have my birthday and 1st anniversary with my boyfriend this Saturday. I have a friend's wedding next Saturday. A weekend trip in November. But that isn't going to stop me from keeping my focus. I've been bad about fitting in working when I get busy. And letting myself completely go in restaurants. Really with no excuse other than I got lazy. And I know as well as anyone that losing weight and being healthy takes effort. So here's what I'm gonna do:
1. Work out at least 5 times a week. Even if it's for 30 minutes, it's still keeping my metabolism going. I've been able to work out all but one day since last Tuesday and it's helped so much. And a few extra hundred calories to absorb any birthday treats always helps!
2. Be smart when ordering food that I didn't make. Restaurants have been especially bad, and I know I'll be drinking beer on my birthday. No need to compound the beer calories with crap food calories. There are delicious, healthy things i can choose instead.
3. Don't go over my 1500 calories, preferably stay around 1300. That's the biggest change I've made in the past week, dropped my calories down from an entirely too generous number. I'm eating lots of protein, fruits and such, I just need to minimize the extra snacking. Therefore, no more Triscuits, hahaha.
Hopefully with keeping these things in mind, I'll have a great birthday weekend and I won't be playing catchup for 2 weeks after it. I have my friend's wedding next weekend too, so fitting in workouts will be a bit trickier. Hopefully working out Mon-Fri with Sat and Sun off will be OK. I feel so much better and my clothes look better that I'm not giving up now. Maybe this will give me the push I need to finally get further into the 140s! It started with just getting back down to 150, but if I'm losing and it continues, that would be AMAZING. We'll see how it goes, a week at a time.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
A Neverending Battle
It had to happen at some point: I got comfortable. I got a bit complacent, and I got, I'll admit it, lazy.
After taking a step back from being completely neurotic about the numbers on the scale, I felt a bit better about not having to worry about every bite and every workout. I was OK with being around 150, knowing that if I let my body settle a bit and then kicked it into high gear again, I could start losing. Well, I took a few too many steps back...
All the way back to October 2010. The last time I saw 160 on the scale (probably more like Sept. actually). But anyways, I've been traveling non-stop it felt like since the last week of August. A few days in California for business, a trip to Phoenix to see a friend, spending the entire weekend at my boyfriend's place, another business trip (this one was 9 days) and two weekend trips to Jersey mixed in there too. The result, a month of eating out too much and only getting in 2 workouts a week if I was lucky. And then I realized what I really had done last night. I stepped on the scale after finally being back in my apartment after 4 days of being gone.
160.0
I thought I was losing my mind. So I reset the scale and tried again. Same exact number. SERIOUSLY? I went from flirting with below 150s to flirting with above 160? In A MONTH??? It's possible to backpeddle that much in a month???
It was a wake up call that I needed. I saw how easy it is to completely erase what was effectively a year of work. I've been great at keeping right around that 150 point, but I know now that I can't let myself have that much leeway with what I eat and when I workout. I think the food is the biggest issue. All the restaurant food I've had lately, between traveling and with friends/boyfriend/family, is adding way too many calories that I'm not burning off. I need to make smarter decisions when I choose what to eat, I don't need a pizza with 2 beers and some dessert. There are plenty of healthy options out there, and I don't need to drink that much beer (although it is delicious).
And as for the working out, I haven't been making time for it and I need to. Part of it was the crazy schedule, but the other part is just not feeling like it and letting that side of my brain win the battle. I finally packed some gym clothes for tonight, and I'm going for an hour after work. I need to get in the habit again and I'm in dire need of some cardio to burn off lots of calories.
So the moral of this cautionary tale... ANYONE can slip up. I know a lot of people like to read my blogs for advice and a point of view from someone who really successfully conquered a weight problem. But, here's proof that it's possible to take a few steps back while trying to move forward in life. I don't like that my work pants are a tiny bit snug. Or that I didn't want to wear a shirt I liked because it was a bit tighter around my stomach. Or that I couldn't run a full mile outside without stopping (when I've done 5K+ at a time before).
But, it's a place I can get back to with some hard work and focus. I've already gone food shopping to get things to make for my meals (especially packing my lunch), I packed the gym clothes, and most importantly, I'm aware that there's a problem. And I'm going to fix it. I have a week and a half until my 25th birthday (Oct 22nd) and my one year anniversary with Randy (on the same day, haha) and I want to get most of this extra weight gone. I know a lot of it is water weight from all the restaurant food, so I'm hoping it comes off fast. I need to look hot in a new dress for that day! I saw 157.7 on the scale the morning (I know, terrifying!) but I don't doubt that I can be back around 152-153 by next week. And hopefully a few weeks after that be back into the 140s. I need to get that fire back that I've had for the last year and a half.
And most importantly, learn to balance life and the scale. It's not easy, as I've learned, but it's something I'm going to have to do if I want to make this change permanent.
After taking a step back from being completely neurotic about the numbers on the scale, I felt a bit better about not having to worry about every bite and every workout. I was OK with being around 150, knowing that if I let my body settle a bit and then kicked it into high gear again, I could start losing. Well, I took a few too many steps back...
All the way back to October 2010. The last time I saw 160 on the scale (probably more like Sept. actually). But anyways, I've been traveling non-stop it felt like since the last week of August. A few days in California for business, a trip to Phoenix to see a friend, spending the entire weekend at my boyfriend's place, another business trip (this one was 9 days) and two weekend trips to Jersey mixed in there too. The result, a month of eating out too much and only getting in 2 workouts a week if I was lucky. And then I realized what I really had done last night. I stepped on the scale after finally being back in my apartment after 4 days of being gone.
160.0
I thought I was losing my mind. So I reset the scale and tried again. Same exact number. SERIOUSLY? I went from flirting with below 150s to flirting with above 160? In A MONTH??? It's possible to backpeddle that much in a month???
It was a wake up call that I needed. I saw how easy it is to completely erase what was effectively a year of work. I've been great at keeping right around that 150 point, but I know now that I can't let myself have that much leeway with what I eat and when I workout. I think the food is the biggest issue. All the restaurant food I've had lately, between traveling and with friends/boyfriend/family, is adding way too many calories that I'm not burning off. I need to make smarter decisions when I choose what to eat, I don't need a pizza with 2 beers and some dessert. There are plenty of healthy options out there, and I don't need to drink that much beer (although it is delicious).
And as for the working out, I haven't been making time for it and I need to. Part of it was the crazy schedule, but the other part is just not feeling like it and letting that side of my brain win the battle. I finally packed some gym clothes for tonight, and I'm going for an hour after work. I need to get in the habit again and I'm in dire need of some cardio to burn off lots of calories.
So the moral of this cautionary tale... ANYONE can slip up. I know a lot of people like to read my blogs for advice and a point of view from someone who really successfully conquered a weight problem. But, here's proof that it's possible to take a few steps back while trying to move forward in life. I don't like that my work pants are a tiny bit snug. Or that I didn't want to wear a shirt I liked because it was a bit tighter around my stomach. Or that I couldn't run a full mile outside without stopping (when I've done 5K+ at a time before).
But, it's a place I can get back to with some hard work and focus. I've already gone food shopping to get things to make for my meals (especially packing my lunch), I packed the gym clothes, and most importantly, I'm aware that there's a problem. And I'm going to fix it. I have a week and a half until my 25th birthday (Oct 22nd) and my one year anniversary with Randy (on the same day, haha) and I want to get most of this extra weight gone. I know a lot of it is water weight from all the restaurant food, so I'm hoping it comes off fast. I need to look hot in a new dress for that day! I saw 157.7 on the scale the morning (I know, terrifying!) but I don't doubt that I can be back around 152-153 by next week. And hopefully a few weeks after that be back into the 140s. I need to get that fire back that I've had for the last year and a half.
And most importantly, learn to balance life and the scale. It's not easy, as I've learned, but it's something I'm going to have to do if I want to make this change permanent.
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